Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
