Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
