Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
