Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
