the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
