Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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