ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
