Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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