and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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