If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
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