so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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