i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
it's like iHOP with fire
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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