we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It's blow job season.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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