if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Enjoy the penises
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
