how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I wish i was in the wii world.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
