Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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