: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
