I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
