Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
