butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Randomize
