I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I showed him my bush... on skype.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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