yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
