She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
