I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
