dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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