My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
