I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
