Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
