It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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