How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
