I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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