But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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