my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
