Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
