I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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