is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Green mimosas i think yes
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
