North Korea, Best Korea!
Say something about gay babies.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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