Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
