the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Randomize
