there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
