he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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