a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
How does one acquire holy water?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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