never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
