to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
