i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
