You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
