I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
