Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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