Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
