dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
3 2 1 whiskey
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
